1:10 AM, Saturday night, PVR Cinema, Hyderabad:
P and I are waiting for M to get the car from the parking lot after a movie. A silver Santro backs out of an illegal parking spot, loud headbanging music pulsing out of its windows. The driver turns on the headlights (covered in some white coating) beaming them at us, bathing us in eerie white light. Takes off tyres screeching and deliberately comes towards us before veering onto the exit route. P and I shake our heads in exasperation.
1:12 AM, Saturday night, PVR Cinema, Hyderabad:
We are still waiting, looking at the gate to the parking lot when a Maruti 800 zooms out. As it passes, a guy hanging out the right rear window yells, "Hey girls, got guys for tonight?" Tiny voice in my head commands me not to flinch or give the slightest hint that I heard. The car rolls out of sight around the bend and I realise that I was clenching my teeth. P and I exhale.
Does this really fluster me? The answer is 'No'- This wasn't the first time I faced something like this and I know it won't be the last, plus I've seen worse. Questions start popping to mind though. Were we "provocatively dressed"? Yes, if Jeans and T-shirts can be termed that. Was it an isolated spot? Not exactly; there was a horde of people milling about since two movies had got over at the same time. Who the fuck do they think they are? What gives them the right to behave this way? Perhaps it's some warped form of play that gives them the cheap thrills they seek. I suspect all of us have lulled ourselves into believing that its the lower strata of society where education and grooming are lacking that women are treated with no respect. That educated, cultured men are different. Where we were on Saturday night is supposed to be host to the supposedly 'good' educated crowd of Hyderabad. That's the reason why the more I think of it, the more disgusted I feel.
Sadly, they are the depraved creations of a macro system in decay- faulty upringing, inappropriate associations in the formative years, a dysfunctional law enforcement system and the "victim" mentality of the greater populace. Yet I turn a deaf ear and blind eye confronted with a situation like this. Why do I not react? Am I scared? Nope- definitely not when I know that I can sucker punch the human equivalent of a shrimp that just squealed nonsense. I freeze to avoid a scene. I've been conditioned to believe that taking flight is better than fighting in this kind of a situation. Look at any literature on self defense- best tactic is to run if possible. Just as I've been conditioned to use this tactic, so have most women. And that's come to be expected of us. Maybe its time to change things. Just maybe.
P and I are waiting for M to get the car from the parking lot after a movie. A silver Santro backs out of an illegal parking spot, loud headbanging music pulsing out of its windows. The driver turns on the headlights (covered in some white coating) beaming them at us, bathing us in eerie white light. Takes off tyres screeching and deliberately comes towards us before veering onto the exit route. P and I shake our heads in exasperation.
1:12 AM, Saturday night, PVR Cinema, Hyderabad:
We are still waiting, looking at the gate to the parking lot when a Maruti 800 zooms out. As it passes, a guy hanging out the right rear window yells, "Hey girls, got guys for tonight?" Tiny voice in my head commands me not to flinch or give the slightest hint that I heard. The car rolls out of sight around the bend and I realise that I was clenching my teeth. P and I exhale.
Does this really fluster me? The answer is 'No'- This wasn't the first time I faced something like this and I know it won't be the last, plus I've seen worse. Questions start popping to mind though. Were we "provocatively dressed"? Yes, if Jeans and T-shirts can be termed that. Was it an isolated spot? Not exactly; there was a horde of people milling about since two movies had got over at the same time. Who the fuck do they think they are? What gives them the right to behave this way? Perhaps it's some warped form of play that gives them the cheap thrills they seek. I suspect all of us have lulled ourselves into believing that its the lower strata of society where education and grooming are lacking that women are treated with no respect. That educated, cultured men are different. Where we were on Saturday night is supposed to be host to the supposedly 'good' educated crowd of Hyderabad. That's the reason why the more I think of it, the more disgusted I feel.
Sadly, they are the depraved creations of a macro system in decay- faulty upringing, inappropriate associations in the formative years, a dysfunctional law enforcement system and the "victim" mentality of the greater populace. Yet I turn a deaf ear and blind eye confronted with a situation like this. Why do I not react? Am I scared? Nope- definitely not when I know that I can sucker punch the human equivalent of a shrimp that just squealed nonsense. I freeze to avoid a scene. I've been conditioned to believe that taking flight is better than fighting in this kind of a situation. Look at any literature on self defense- best tactic is to run if possible. Just as I've been conditioned to use this tactic, so have most women. And that's come to be expected of us. Maybe its time to change things. Just maybe.
